The Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries

from by Gray Rinehart

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Adapted from "The Seventy Maxims of Maximally Effective Mercenaries" by Howard Tayler


Muster, muster, mercenaries, learn the maxims good and true
They're the keys to maximal effectiveness in everything we do

The maxims are better far than doctrine
They make more sense and are easier to learn
They're all about fighting smart instead of harder
And they start with the simplest: Pillage, then burn

You know that any Sergeant who's in motion
Outranks a Lieutenant who doesn't know what's going on
But an ordnance technician moving at a dead run
Should be followed because he outranks everyone


When the going gets too tough, the tough call for air support
Because close air support covereth a multitude of sins
And you know if you're not willing to shell your own position
Then really, you're not willing enough to win

Never turn your back on an enemy, and don't be afraid
To be the first to resort to violence when opposed
'Cause if violence wasn’t your last resort, you failed to resort to enough of it
And there's no such thing as "overkill," just "open fire" and "reload"


If you can see the whites of their eyes, someone's done something wrong
And the enemy of my enemy is my enemy's enemy -- nothing more
And the Platinum Rule of mercenaries is "do unto others"
And that which does not kill you has made a tactical error

We have far too many maxims than we can fit in just one song
But you'll keep your company happy if you take them all to heart
And if the food is good enough the grunts won't complain about the incoming fire
But the company mess and friendly fire should be easier to tell apart



from Distorted Vision, released August 22, 2015
Words and music by Gray Rinehart
Gray Rinehart - vocals and backing vocals
Mark Minervino - instruments
Recorded at Stormghost Studio, Cary, NC, and MKM Studios, Scarborough, ME
Engineered and produced by Mark Minervino



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Gray Rinehart North Carolina

Gray Rinehart writes science fiction, fantasy, assorted nonfiction, and the odd song. Or odd songs.

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